Wednesday, June 30, 2010

An Aha Moment

So I have had an "aha" moment with finances! I used to be one of those people who did not mind having debt and wanted to live in the moment, i always felt like why not spend it now because who knows if you will be able to enjoy it later? But now I am on this new kick! i have started the Dave Ramsey plan and am actually really excited about it, there is something very empowering about taking control of your money instead of having it control you. So i am waxing my own eyebrows and going to learn how to cut my sons hair! We are even going to sell our house and live smaller to save money and be able to have an emergency fund and get rid of our debt! Wow is this ME talking or have i been possessed! lol -It is really kind of fun and exciting trying to figure out different ways to save money!
I mean dont get me wrong i have my weak moments but am trying to remind myself that if i can stick with this later we will be able to retire young and not have to work for the rest of my life! So i am on with my new adventure! i will keep you posted on the ups and downs -- hopefully more ups than downs!

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

My Passion?

So lately I have been really thinking about what my passion is in life? Do I have one? What is it? I assume that there are a lot of people that feel this way and all of us are wondering how do you know what it is? You see these people that have a job they just absolutely love and say how it is their passion, wow I WANT THAT! I wish so much that I had a job that was MY PASSION, that I loved going to everyday and felt like I was making a difference in the world! I cant even imagine. But the question still remains HOW do i figure out what my passion is and then how do I turn that into my job!
I am not going to lie, I have never been the most decisive person in the world (lol) I mean sometimes I cant make a decision on where I want to eat let alone the BIG decisions! When I had to decide where I was going to go to college I flipped a coin and I am not joking that is how I decided, I cant help but laugh. I think I am getting better about making decisions as I get older but I think being decisive will always be a struggle for me, I always feel like there is so much on the line either way I choose. I mean if I eat chicken then I miss out on crab legs but if I eat crab legs I miss out on that awesome sauce that comes on the chicken -lol yep that is how my mind works -round and round! Its pretty exhausting! I am hoping there are people out there like me and can laugh about this with me, cause to me that is the best medicine laughter, otherwise we cry and what fun is that!
So I am going to focus on what MY passion is and if I can turn that into something I do everyday that would be a dream come true! I mean when I am 80 I dont want to look back and regret that I never found it or even tried to.
Life is crazy and it is full of decision making and hard choices and sometimes I wonder why it has to be so hard and how I will ever get through but I guess we grow with every decision we make and every hard choice we get through. You know the saying "it builds character" well that is true going through something that is hard, embarrasing, scary, uncertain definitely changes you and hopefully for the better. I have many times wondered, what if I had made a different choice where would I be now? Sometimes I have wished that I could just see how it would have turned out, what my life would have been like? But I do believe that things happen for a reason and that you are where you are meant to be so I just have to trust my decisions....yikes! lol

Thursday, June 10, 2010

A Big Day

So as you can see i am just trying to get a hang of this whole 'blogging' thing, i am a bit of a perfectionist so the look of it takes a lot of time for me, so who knows you may open this up tommorrow afternoon and it will look completely different ;)
Today was a big day for me, I made a decision that was well huge. It is scary to make decisions when you dont know the outcome. Change is exciting but it is also very hard and very scary and VERY complicated; especially when you are not the only one involved. It makes it so hard to think clearly, to think for yourself, your needs but at the end of the day you have to think of YOUR needs. I ,a lot of times; as i am sure a lot of people have a very hard time doing this. It is hard for me to put my needs first but today I did just that. It felt really good but it also felt very scary and to be honest a little selfish....I think sometimes we are so worried about putting our needs first we sabotage what it feels like or that it might be good for us, for me I felt empowered, but i also felt selfish when in reality it was something I NEEDED to do, i needed to do this for me and my family. So I will probably have to cry my eyes out about it and then put my big girl panties on and embrace this, move forward into a new world. A world where I do not "feel bad" for taking care of myself, because like they always say "If you don't take care of yourself no one else will" and there is a lot of truth to that. We are the only ones that can truly do what is best for us, it is our/my life and we/I have control of it and we need to remember this and never forget it! I do not ever want to get back to that place where I dont take care of myself, it doesn't feel right for me and it never did, I always felt out of my skin when I wasn't looking out for myself. So tomorrow I wake up excited and scared all wrapped up in one but happy with myself for protecting me.

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

MY VERY FIRST POST!

So this is my very first post on my new blog site! I am very excited to have a space where i can share my life with you and hopefully connect with people on some level big or small. I am not exactly sure what my blog will be specifically about. I have seen a lot of people do blogs on specific things like cooking and recipes. I think mine will mostly be to share my day to day life, it is a blog "about nothing" lol --for all of you Seinfeld fans out there --which i totally am!

I guess today I am just going to talk a little bit about life and how it can be so hard, sometimes i wonder, why it has to be so hard? I assume that there are lots of people sharing this thought but for many different or alike reasons. My life lately has been pretty stressful and I sometimes think "how , how do i know what to do" "how do i know what is the right decision" and then i think even bigger, "how do we ever know if the decisions we made were right?" i guess that is where Faith comes in, how or wherever your faith is, ya gotta have it. I am one of those people that truly believes that everything happens for a reason; good or bad, things happen for a reason and in the end you always look back and think wow I made it through and am better for it......but damn is it hard in the moment.